Carlos calls his boss in the morning:

“Eeh, boss I not come work today I really sick. I got headache, stomach ache my legs hurt I not come work.”

The boss says: “You know Carlos you are a really important guy I really need you today. Look, when I feel like that I go to my wife and tell her to give a blowjob. That makes me feel better and then I am able go to work. You should try that.”

2 hours later Carlos calls: “Boss, I did what you said and you are right I feel great, I’ll be at work soon...”

“Oh..by the way, you got really nice house.”